With this week's Celebrity Slap, we remember all those brave souls who have died in ninja-related accidents.
Accident: Former "View" host Debbie Mantenopolous was injured after wrongly falling on an airbag during a show taping. She was attempting a stunt called a "practice fall," and it went wrong. That's what happens when one windbag hits another.
Banks on it: Model Tyra Banks is in talks to serve as executive producer for a daytime talk show. First show topic: "Help, I'm an aging model with no discernable talent!"
Don't Want to See: Darren Star, the creator of "Sex and the City," is developing a show in which he goes behind the scenes at expensive New York restaurants. Now customers will know exactly which underpaid busboy put bodily fluids in their soup. The idea sounds as unattractive as the former cast members of "Sex and the City."
Toni awarded: Forgotten singer Toni Braxton has signed a deal with the WB to develop a comedy series based upon her life. It will feature situations as hilariously screwed up as her records.
Desperation: There's a buzz around ABC's new prime-time soap, "Desperate Housewives." Some say the idea is tawdry, but if it weren't for the desperate housewives of America, 16-year-old boys would live day to day with no hope.
It's a Sinatra: "These Boots are Made for Walkin'" singer Nancy Sinatra has just released a new album on Sanctuary Records. CS would like to add her to the ever-growing list of people who, contrary to our beliefs, aren't dead.
Ouch!: Singer Beyonce pulled a hamstring while practicing for an upcoming TV special. Reports say she's doing well, but that her injury can be blamed on her ignoring the eternal dance maxim "shake it, don't break it." She'll find that a bit funnier when she gets off the crutches, we promise.
Happy Day: Pop/punk veterans Green Day are on top of the Billboard charts this week with their new "American Idiot" album. So let's get this straight: An album about how lots of Americans are idiots is the most popular album in America. Thus proving the point. Sometimes, you just don't even have to embellish.
Say it Ain't So!: Sean Connery has pulled out of his latest movie and is talking retirement. CS would like to salute this man, who, even at his age, could kick our asses and seduce our women.
Twins: Celebrity straight-to-video champs the Olsen Twins have signed a 10-year distribution deal with Warner Home Video. Now that they're 18, here's hoping one of those videos co-stars Paris Hilton.
Until next week, remember that strippers don't really like you. They're just naked people who want your money.
Stories taken from various sources, including E! News. Also, much of this was made up.