Here's to Pong, the chapter that made me
December 03, 2013
I love an educated opinion, but I unabashedly hate an unfounded one.
Last Friday, at around 5 p.m., I received an email that said all it needed to say in the very first sentence, "...the charter of the Alpha Sigma Chapter, located at the University of Tennessee, is hereby ...
Finding foreign language appreciation from awkward silence
November 19, 2013
I hate uncomfortable silences.
Uma Thurman said it best in "Pulp Fiction" when she and John Travolta's iconic Vincent Vega shared one of the longest uncomfortable silences in cinema history. They sat in a cheesy diner with a fabricated 1920s mood and ran out of equally cheesy and disingenuous ...
Goodbye to my Blockbuster childhood
November 12, 2013
I loved Blockbuster.
When I heard the news of Blockbuster finally giving up the ghost to its modernized, web-streaming competitors, I was inconsolable.
Not because Blockbuster was an inherently efficient or convenient way to view movies as compared to our modern day movie viewing mediums. Not because because it was ...
Why I believe in leopard skin pants and rock 'n' roll
November 05, 2013
I love '80s cover bands.
This was the only sentence my brain could even attempt to manifest during my most recent encounter with the Fly-By Radio at a bar a few weeks ago.
For those of you regrettably unaware of Birmingham's '80s metal lovechild, all you need to know ...
Step into the ring and out of your comfort zone
October 29, 2013
I love getting punched in the face.
Most who know me probably look at that sentence and feel completely perplexed, wondering how in the world placid and mild-mannered Chase Parker could ever be in a situation where the end result would be getting punched in the face. Prior to coming ...
Reward your servers with more than a grain of salt
October 08, 2013
I hate consumers.
I don't mean I hate consumers in a hippie, off the grid, anti-Western ideology type thing. I freely admit to spending my free time yelling at my Xbox, piddling on my iPhone, watching the 3-hour long advertisement we call American football and generally craving a litany ...
America: a culture literally obsessed with exaggeration
October 01, 2013
I hate the words literally and obsessed.
Let me describe a scenario every Daily Beacon reader has encountered:
Let's say you and your friends are sitting around a cozy Starbucks synthetic wood table, enjoying a rousing discussion about your respective tastes in cinema. You say to your friends, "I ...
Today's TV is our generations greatest work of art
September 24, 2013
I love television.
I know many of you automatically arrive at the notion of how vain and ineffectual television programming is when you hear a statement like that.
But you're wrong.
After spending yet another would-be peaceful Sunday evening vice-gripping a bowl of popcorn, unable to even eat its ...
Insignificant battles blind students from real issues
September 17, 2013
I love a good argument.
I have been glued to the pages of the Beacon during the past week, hoping to find the next iteration in a heated debate concerning fashion.
After a staff writer wrote a critique of style conformity that seemingly targeted members of the Greek community, hostility ...
Big city identity can be found in humble beginnings
September 10, 2013
I hated my hometown.
I am sure there are many of you who share in my resentment of my respective humble beginning. It is easy to juxtapose the massive scope of Knoxville – a city boasting more than half a million people in the greater surrounding area – to the rural hamlet ...
Stop demanding off-field heroism from sports stars
September 03, 2013
We hate sports.
Okay that can't be true. ESPN just generated $11 billion in revenue last year, and I couldn't get my ritualistic post-game Zaxby's because of the massive traffic congestion that 100,000 people inevitably cause on Saturday evenings in Knoxville.
Perhaps we don't hate ...
Smoking receives bad reputation in hypocritical society
August 27, 2013
I love cigarettes.
Now, I am sure the majority of readers' hands are already trembling with anxiety as they think of how to reply to such an egregiously taboo admission.
Before my inbox is assaulted with more anti-tobacco literature than could ever be handed out on Pedestrian, let me preface ...